50 Funny & Wonderful Gabriel Iglesias Quotes

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Which are your favorite Gabriel Iglesias quotes?

Gabriel Iglesias is an American actor, comedian, and writer. He is best known as Fluffy. He is a successful stand-up comedian who released a ton of comedy specials. In 2012, he was nominated for an ‘ALMA Award ‘for Favorite TV Reality, Variety, or Comedy Personality or Act.

He has been featured in several TV shows and movies, ‘Magic Mike, ‘A Haunted House 2’, ‘My Wife and Kids’, ‘The High Fructose Adventures of Annoying Orange’, and ‘Modern Family’.

Here’s our collection of the funniest Gabriel Iglesias quotes:


50 Funny & Wonderful Gabriel Iglesias Quotes

1. “I’m a control freak. When I’m doing stand-up, I say what I want and then I get instant feedback.” – Gabriel Iglesias

2. “I just tell stories about things that have happened to me. As long as I’m alive and I’m living and I’m experiencing different things every day, the show will always change.” – Gabriel Iglesias

3. “Believe it or not, I’ve got a really bad metabolism. One burger, and I’m done. I’m not a guy that puts away 10 burgers.” – Gabriel Iglesias

4. “I started riding the whole ‘fluffy’ train, and it’s a cute word and socially a lot more acceptable than someone saying is fat or obese. If you call a girl ‘fat,’ yo, she’ll raise hell, but if you say, ‘Aw girl, look at you, you’re fluffy,’ there’s almost a sexy appeal to it.” – Gabriel Iglesias

5. “I don’t want to die tomorrow knowing I could’ve had a piece of cake tonight.” – Gabriel Iglesias

6. “Life is measured by how you lived it, not by the years.” – Gabriel Iglesias

7. “In the beginning, when I was doing my shows, I was incorporating a lot of Spanish, just trying to be a Latino comic instead of just a comic. Now I try to make the show as broad as possible… I don’t want to alienate people. I want to make it so everybody can follow along and everybody can relate.” – Gabriel Iglesias

8. “I’m always very happy to talk to people.” – Gabriel Iglesias

9. “I want to be known as a funny comic, not just a funny Latino comic. I want to be able to go everywhere and anywhere.” – Gabriel Iglesias


10th of 50 Gabriel Iglesias Quotes

10. “I almost bought a DeLorean the other day just because. If I see something that I think is cool and I like it, I’ll go for it.” – Gabriel Iglesias


11. “You wonder why I only talk about my personal life. But that’s all I’ve ever done.” – Gabriel Iglesias

12. “I just go out there and tell some stories, and people can relate.” – Gabriel Iglesias

13. “You gotta live life before you can talk about it. Sometimes when things don’t work out in life, they work out on stage.” – Gabriel Iglesias

14. “It’s because you alienate half the room talking about sports. Half the crowd will be against you no matter what you say.” – Gabriel Iglesias

15. “Some comics don’t like it when people talk during the set, and it does get a little bit annoying after a while, but I basically let people dictate what jokes I’m going to do.” – Gabriel Iglesias

16. “I got off the plane – I was walking and cooking at the same time.” – Gabriel Iglesias

17. “Social media has definitely changed the game for me. I am able to connect to my fans on Twitter and interact with them, daily. YouTube has been a game-changer as well – people around the world have been exposed to my comedy through my YouTube channel.” – Gabriel Iglesias

18. “I relate to people, and the guy on stage is very much the guy that’s off stage. People know when it’s fake.” – Gabriel Iglesias

19. “I want to get so famous that I don’t have to wake up in the morning. It’ll probably never happen.” – Gabriel Iglesias


20th of 50 Gabriel Iglesias Quotes

20. “As far as guys who perform on stage, I love Chris Rock. I’m kind of jaded on everyone else.” – Gabriel Iglesias


21. “I was not the popular kid in school.” – Gabriel Iglesias

22. “When you go to Hawaii, it’s all about “Aloha.” It means hello, goodbye and I love you.” – Gabriel Iglesias

23. “We don’t carry guns, we carry cookies.” – Gabriel Iglesias

24. “I never go perform somewhere alone. I’ve done that since day one. I’ve always taken other comics with me.” – Gabriel Iglesias

25. “You know, a lot of people think that just ’cause you work out, lift weights, eat right, and do what people tell you to do that you’ll live a long live, maybe you will. But, why do people measure life by the years instead about how good the years were.” – Gabriel Iglesias

26. “I just know you can not be on top forever. There’s always going to be the next guy, and if I’m going to go down, I’d like to know I helped the next guy take my spot.” – Gabriel Iglesias

27. “I usually travel with a posse. I roll deep. I travel like a rapper, but without the artillery.” – Gabriel Iglesias

28. “I learned early on, stay away from politics, stay away from religion, and don’t talk about sports. Those three right there will get you in trouble.” – Gabriel Iglesias

29. “As long as you have a director, that’s your feedback. It’s the director telling you, “Okay. That was great! Okay. Can we add a little? Can you tweak it like this? Can you make it more high pitched? Can you give it a little growl?” – Gabriel Iglesias


30th of 50 Gabriel Iglesias Quotes

30. “Connecting with people is not hard. I love the interaction and the feedback after shows. It does take some time, but the fans appreciate it which makes it worth it.” – Gabriel Iglesias


31. “The Ford Flex is a really, really cool car. You get inside and you have so much headroom and it’s really comfortable to drive and it’s real techy inside. You look at the screen and it’s blue and you’ve got all kinds of controls. Everything is digital.” – Gabriel Iglesias

32. “When you leave, you basically want to go eat, because I talk a lot about food in my act. So when you leave, you leave hungry.” – Gabriel Iglesias

33. “Being on TV sucks. It’s a lot of work. You memorize scripts and then you show up and they change everything.” – Gabriel Iglesias

34. “When you’re a comedian, the Holy Grail is an hour-long HBO special.” – Gabriel Iglesias

35. “I don’t have to worry about writing jokes. ” – Gabriel Iglesias

36. “I found that laughter was a form of acceptance, and I really enjoyed that and I just – I crave it.” – Gabriel Iglesias

37. “I know what it’s like to have a family and not have insurance and really need it. As a comic, insurance was one of those sacrifices I made early on until I could afford it.” – Gabriel Iglesias

38. “I’m a big boy, but I can get jiggy with it. Ladies, I will go to dance clubs, and I will tear it up hardcore for a good 30 seconds.” – Gabriel Iglesias

39. “I get a lot of influence from pro wrestling. People are like, ‘Oh, it’s fake.’ But it’s not about whether the guy wins or loses, it’s about how he entertains you the whole time you’re watching.” – Gabriel Iglesias


40th of 50 Gabriel Iglesias Quotes

40. “I’m all about showing people that I’m a little messed up, I have a lot of the same problems you have. By exposing myself and putting myself out there, people can relate to me and my act won’t grow stale. I mean, nobody wants to hear a comedian say, Life is great.” – Gabriel Iglesias


41. “I’m a big guy, but I’m really simple with the food. I’ll hit the In-N-Out or just the regular buffets.” – Gabriel Iglesias

42. “I don’t get controversial, I don’t get political and I don’t tell you what to do with your life.” – Gabriel Iglesias

43. “Comedians do movies and TV so that when they tour, they sell out. That’s the goal: To get popular enough so the place is packed.” – Gabriel Iglesias

44. “You can’t prevent the inevitable, but you can join the ship.” – Gabriel Iglesias

45. “I’ll walk up to a woman, I’ll say the first thing that comes to mind: Hey, you hungry?” – Gabriel Iglesias

46. “I’m a comedian who happens to be Latino. What’s the difference? The difference is, my special will air on Comedy Central, not Telemundo.” – Gabriel Iglesias

47. “Comedy is my passion. I’m going to do this until I drop.” – Gabriel Iglesias

48. “Home in bed listening to the rain getting ready to order a pizza. Sounds like a song till the last part.” – Gabriel Iglesias

49. “I wanted to be a comedian, and this is what I’m doing. If I can keep this going, I’m happy.” – Gabriel Iglesias

50. “Stand-up is not just an American thing anymore. It’s global. In some places, stand-up comedy is brand new. South Africa has only had a scene for 15 years.” – Gabriel Iglesias



Thanks for checking out this collection of quotes from Gabriel Iglesias! Don’t forget to share them on social media with your friends and family.

Which are your favorite Gabriel Iglesias quotes? Leave a comment below.

Zisilia Alvsa
Zisilia Alvsa
Zisilia Alvsa is a writer for Wealthy Gorilla. Friends often call her Zii. She is a girl from Jakarta, Indonesia who currently lives in Bali. Zii loves photography and travelling.


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